Security tank / Love tank

Since our daughter has been home we have discovered something about her, something she is lacking and she needs desperately.  Security, or maybe its just good old fashioned love.  Lisa tells me almost every day as I am away at work, how Lillibet will cry even if Lisa goes into the other room for but a brief moment.  Lisa loves that she needs her so desperately, of course at times it makes it very difficult to do anything much at all, and Lisa can get mildly frustrated.  Mostly though Lisa patiently loves her.  I told Lisa a few weeks ago to think of it as just filling her love tank that needs filling.  I have been staying with Lillibet on Wednesdays when Lisa and the girls are at church, this past Wednesday I experienced the same thing. Lillibet would cry loudly and come crawling towards me desperately trying to find me.  I took her for a walk in her stroller, I noticed about half way through the walk she began looking up to see my face every few seconds, she wanted to know I was still there and had not left her.  Sometimes its difficult to even think about all the transitions she has had in her short life.  She is only 15 months old, but she was with her mother for 6 months, at an orphanage in Southern Ethiopia for 4 months, and in the Care Center in the capital city for 3 months before coming home with us these past 2 months.

Someone recently commented, after watching Lillibet for just an hour or so, that you can tell she really gets a lot of attention.  Lisa said that yes she has 4 siblings and a mommy and a daddy, plus her doggie at home to take care of her.  As we thought of that comment, we thought of how misunderstood Lillibet was by this person.  How her deep need was not clear to this person, this person was not aware of her brief history here on Gods Earth.  At first it upset me and I wanted to say something, try to explain how deep her need is and what has happened to her in her life, to share her deep need.  Then I began to think of how much I misunderstand when I look around at others.  Had I not walked this adoption path for over 2 years now, read all the books and other information that I have, how I would have had the same perception.  I wonder how much we all misunderstand?  Who do we judge based upon our experiences not understanding the deep needs of those around us.  Maybe, just maybe we all should take a deep breath, stop assuming we understand what others have gone through in life, and just simply try to fill their love tanks.  Let them know we will just be there for them, no matter what.  So that when they look up from that stroller every few moments, they see that were still there, still walking with them.